Contra el tiempo

I am doing my best and that's always enough.

I'm 26 yo, almost 27 on the 27th, by now ten years ago I thought by this time I would have been married, living with that significant other, had finished my career, probably in the middle of the 2nd one and this list can go on and on...

I'm behind my time, my mom has always advised me you have until 25 to closure your student timeframe, then I was supposed to seek like a husband, or move out or whatever people do after finishing their career path...

The amount of anxiety this used to create for me was outstanding!
And its because I wasn't meeting the worldwide expectation, my moms, my family...

Every time (and still happens) people ask me what about University?

I have this sorrow and this feeling to cry, because being so close to graduate yet so far.
I was stopping myself because it wasn't "in the permitted time" I was falling behind.
I was carrying the mountains I was meant to climb**

And what did I conquer with all that pity?
Anxiousness, depression, sadness, sorrow...
I was hopeless, I would take whatever people could give me because that's what I thought I deserved for not being apt to the world standardization of "being someone".

Its a fact, that we are surrounded by this ticking clock, rushing us...
For what exactly?

Things take time, but you are your clock owner.
While you search for what you want, be happy with what you own.
Strive for being content, if you want to surpass it, excellent!
You want to settle? Great!

But, never underestimate yourself and compare your path with others,
you own your clock, pause it when you have to, rush it when you are allowed, change the batteries when the change is needed

I am against your clock,
I'm on time in mine,
because at this moment what it matters is doing my best and that's always enough.

**Nanja Zebian